“Nothing can consume a man more than the passion of resentment.” — Friedrich Nietzsche
Have you ever wondered:
- Why did the Creator give us the capacity for deep resentment?
- What do we become when resentment slowly eats away at us?
- What is it about human nature that makes us vulnerable to resentment?
- How do our insecurities so easily trigger resentment within us?
What happens when one person’s resentment becomes entangled with another’s — and they pass it on and on and on?
Soon one’s whole world is seething in resentment.
My first introduction to a world marinating in resentment was on the first day of school in 1957.
Mom had the radio on and we heard about Black students attempting to enroll at Central High School in Little Rock, Arkansas being barred from attending.
I was starting third grade and was at a total loss as to why people were acting so cruelly to Black kids just wanting to go to school. And here I sat, eating my oatmeal, NOT wanting to go to school.
My nine-year-old mind couldn’t grasp why race mattered.
I learned on that day — a tribal resentment raged across America.
A force so strong it can bond millions together in a common hate.
Resentment seems like a uniquely human characteristic.
When a young bull elk challenges the alpha male for the herd’s rutting rights and loses, he does not appear to skulk off in resentment.
Humans, though, seem irresistibly drawn to it — and it sucks the joy out of life.
When I think of where I first tangled with resentment I’m reminded of my days as a paper boy delivering the Queen Anne News and the grinding effort it was to collect the fifteen cent delivery fee.
I crashed into the resentments people form around money.
My drill was the same at the end of each month. I’d make my collection rounds, knock on each door and announce:
“Collecting for the Queen Anne News!”
For some people, it was like I was asking for blood — only begrudgingly would they part with fifteen cents.
Mrs. Cederholm, who lived in the fanciest house on our block, always seethed the most. I felt she resented not only my request, but…..me.
Funny thing was, the resentment mostly came from those who had the most.
Conversely, I remember two poor old women on my route who lived in shabby homes. They would greet me each month as a beloved member of the family.
I often was invited in and treated to cookies and milk — and always with a twenty-five-cent tip.
They had little, and yet that mattered not at all to them.
That paper route taught me a lasting truth:
There can be little to no happiness where resentments burn deep.
Hard Stop
I may have been just a paper boy but It gave those women great joy to give me fifteen cents and an oatmeal cookie.
Maya Angelou got it right when she shared,
“I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back.”
Giving IS the great antidote to resentment — letting go of the things we think we possess —
- money
- status
- pride
- tribe
Central High School 2026
The This is as true for an individual, as it is for a whole society.
- Community is not diminished by inclusion,
- Wealth is not lessened by generosity.
We simply have to un-clench our hands.
Just a thought…
Pat
***
Let’s let Mark Pearson soften our hearts and remind us that those we once looked away from may very well be the angels we were searching for.
