“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.” ~ Henry David Thoreau
Tough thing. Living in the moment can be, on occasions, a very uncomfortable place.
Isn’t it easier to daydream about glorious tomorrows than commit to the inglorious moment at hand?
When I wake up I sometimes greet the new day with “This, too, shall pass.”
I remember as a kid desperately wanting to skip over being a little kid and move right into being a big kid.
I marveled at the big kids’ freedom, their confidence and abilities. I wanted to have what they had so I took to pretending I was one of them.
My thinking was simple: If I acted as if I were 16 rather than 14, maybe I could magically be 16.
The problem was the kids I pretended to be were the neighborhood troublemakers. So when trouble found them — trouble found me.
By the end of my freshman year my life was in a free-fall. I was almost not allowed back into my Jesuit high school the next year. I could no longer handle my pretend life and something had to change — and fast.
The change began when I got a call during the first week of my sophomore year to go immediately to the vice principal’s office.
I fully expected Father Goebels, the new vice principal, would read me the riot act just like the previous one had done on so many occasions the year before.
But nothing like that happened.
He wasn’t angry, he wasn’t loud, he wasn’t upset. In fact, he was the opposite — rather quiet and subdued.
He shared what he said were his “observations,” gently, in a way you might expect an older friend would speak to a younger friend.
“As I watch you, Pat, you appear to be in such a hurry to grow up. Frankly, too big of a hurry. The mistakes you’re making are because you’re not ready for the experiences you’re having. The thing about getting older is it takes time. So why don’t you slow down and practice being WHO YOU ARE and stop pretending you’re someone different.
“My advice to you is pretty simple:
- Be who you are
- Be where you are
- Be what you are
“You’re 15 years old, so BE 15 years old. If you do you’ll have the greatest year of your life. Remember, Pat, you’ll never have THIS year again. Don’t lose it — live it.”
With that, our meeting ended. I left his office kind of stunned. I hadn’t been thrashed for my bad behavior the year before. I hadn’t been lectured on straightening my life out. I’d been gently guided into a more realistic way of looking at myself and responding to what I saw.
It was to be the best year of my young life. By the end of that year my grade point average had climbed from 1.8 to 3.8. Father Goebels gave me the tools to stop fearing to live in my own skin.
I’ve recalled many times my visit to the vice principal’s office and why it’s so important I keep myself grounded in the moment.
“Above all, trust in the slow work of God.
We are quite naturally impatient in everything
to reach the end without delay.
We should like to skip the intermediate stages.
We are impatient of being on the way to something
unknown, something new.
And yet it is the law of all progress
that it is made by passing through
some stages of instability—
and that it may take a very long time.” ~
I keep Father Goebels’s suggestion at the top of my to-do list each day:
“You’ll never have THIS moment again. Don’t lose it — live it.”
Just a thought…
Pat
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