“We must develop the capacity to see men not as they are in the present but as they may become.” Thomas Monson
Such are the eyes of Sponsors and Real Friends.
I heard a story of an old man who made it his life’s work to act as the “honorary sponsor” of the Niagara River near the falls. He walked the shores of the river, on guard to catch a glimpse of boats whose trajectory, if not corrected, would take them over the falls. More often than not, in their despair of the moment, that was precisely the intent of the boaters.
And yet many, at the last moment, would come to their senses and want to change course.
And there would be the old man with a life preserver ready to pitch to a person having second thoughts about suicide. He reeled in countless men and women during his time as the Niagara River Sponsor and yet there are no plaques commemorating his service, no Medal of Honor awarded for valiant bravery on behalf of his fellow humans. He simply did what sponsors do: they pass on what they have been given at an earlier date and time.
For it was years before that the old man had been reeled from the brink from his own erstwhile attempt at taking his own life. He had been saved by the river’s sponsor before him. He merely took the life preserver from his predecessor and made it his duty to pass on the life that had been given to him.
Those of us in the recovery community benefit from a very special relationship, that of a sponsor. This relationship is akin to what others might describe as a “real friend.” These individuals are very special to us in that we come to trust their judgement so implicitly and to count on them delivering wise guidance when we need it most.
When I am most likely to call on my sponsor or reach out to a mentor are the times when I either become disengaged from the real world, or so angry with it that I lapse into delusional thinking. I can look from the outside entirely sane, in full control of my faculties, when from the inside I’m entirely WACKO. Sometimes, a whole group of angry, out-of-sorts people can get WACKO at the same time, and calamitous things can happen. Think Germany in the 1920’s and 1930’s. Or, if you want a more recent illustration, just read through any newspaper TODAY!
We therefore count on our sponsors and real friends to look out for us.
- To reel us in when our thinking gets too out there
- To call our bluff when we are pitching a fit with the world
- To slay the imaginary dragons with which we are battling
- To throw us a life preserver when we are going down
There are times when we have not the means to save ourselves and we count on our sponsor or real friends to be there for us.
“True friends walk in when the rest of the world has walked out.” Walter Winchell
Just a thought…
Pat
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